Finding Happiness

Life is stressful sometimes...well for me, a lot of the time. Between going to school, making dinner, running errands, driving kids to and from after-school activities, cleaning the house, and helping with homework...(the list goes on and on)...its easy to forget to sit back, enjoy life, breathe and just be happy. So what is it that makes me happy? When I think about that question, the first things that come to mind are when I see my kids succeed at something they have tried hard to achieve. When I was able to help a friend in need. Or when I reminisce about holidays and vacations with the family. What I noticed, is that all of these things have nothing to do with myself. Im happiest when I see or am able to make other people happy. Everyone finds happiness in different ways, but I believe that selflessness and service have a lot to do with it.

 In a talk given at Brigham Young University, Elder Richard G. Scott posed a series of questions that can help us determine what he defines as "red flags indicating danger ahead." When I read through this list, it helped me to see the red flags in my life that warning me about becoming side tracked and lost. Some questions helped me to remember the things that are truly important in my life, the things that I need to try harder on, and the things I need to give up.

1. Do you think of others more than of yourself?
 2. If you are married, are you more understanding of your companion, more anxious to make life easier for that beloved being than for yourself?
 3. Do you seek time with your children or your parents in preference to a group of private friends?
 4. Does the acquiring of things,when viewed in the brilliant light of reality, sometimes mean more to you than obeying principles known to be true?
 5. Do you thirst after righteousness? Or are there times when the allure of stimulating images is allowed to temporarily fill your mind because, after all, they are really not that bad?
 6. Do your actions focus on entertainment, immediate satisfaction, self-interests,or personal gratification even though your goals are elsewhere?
 7. Do you find yourself often thinking of all of the things that you wish you had that you’ve not been blessed to have--maybe even very desirable ones like a husband or wife or children,good health, more personal attractiveness, more joy and happiness and peace of mind--while neglecting to recognize all that the Lord has blessed you with already?
 8. Do you ever pray to him when your heart is so filled with things to thank him for that you do not feel inclined to ask for anything else?

 Realizing my blessings makes a huge difference in my happiness and in the happiness of my children. I have a couple kids who tend to sway more towards the side of pessimism than I would like. I got tired of listening to them complain about how picked on they were, how hard their day was, and how life just "isn't fair". So I decided to try an experiment on them. Every night before they went to bed, they had to list 5 good things that happened to them that day. At first it was hard for them, (oddly, most things had to do with the type of food or treat they got to eat that day), but as the days went on as they struggled for answers, we turned to the simple solution of just listing a blessing they were grateful for. Gradually, I started to see a change in my kids. They were becoming happier, more positive individuals. They started to whisper to me the good things that they were going to mention that night as they happened. They were now focused on finding the good in life...the things that made them happy. And it made all the difference.

Elder Scott ended his talk by stating, "If you are one of the truly happy individuals who love your Father in Heaven and are grateful for each day’s blessings,reaching out to others in preference to thoughts of self, I rejoice for you. ...I pray that you may feel how very much your Father in Heaven loves you and wants you to be happy. I pray that you will be stirred to recognize how infinitely blessed you are to have a Father in Heaven, to have a plan that is perfect,to be able to acquire a clear understanding of what brings happiness in life through pondering, prayer, and application of his teachings."

 I know, that just as I find happiness in seeing my children happy, our Father in Heaven also smiles down on us when we reach our goals, serve His children, and take time to be aware and thankful for our blessings. He wants us to be happy. That is ultimately what we should be striving for in this life, and He is there to help. We just need to have faith in Him, in His plan, and try. This is my truth.